Friday, January 3, 2014

Finally healing

You all know that I had two motives behind changing my platform. First and foremost, I wanted to prevent other people from encountering a similar tragedy to my own. Second, I hoped that this change would help me through the grieving process after losing my brother. Two months after making the final decision to change my platform, I can honestly say that this change has impacted me more than I predicted. The more that I share my story, the easier it becomes for me to finally swallow the idea of losing Nathan. Having an outlet to talk about his death has been such a blessing. I've said before that I spent the past year and a half in denial. I'm finally approaching a point where I have accepted what happened and am beginning to move on. I've learned that my involvement in pageants has a bigger purpose than wearing a crown, or competing on stage. I was given this title in attempt to overcome Nathan's death. And after reflecting on the past two months since declaring the change, I am excited to say that I am finally starting to heal.